Message Board Conspiracy Theory Solved: Texas A&M Collective

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Rumors have swirled this offseason about how Texas A&M’s NIL collective came to be. How could a school that has had average performance on the field, with only one double-digit win season in the past 20 years, pull off the #1 recruiting class in 2022? 

It has come to the attention of Message Board Geniuses that Texas A&M’s NIL funding goes to the top. The very top. According to sources, former Texas A&M President and former US Secretary of Defense, Robert Gates, has been funneling money from the government to the Texas A&M NIL collective in order to pay recruits to come to Texas A&M. 

While we were initially skeptical, further research only confirms this conspiracy theory. How else would you explain the ’22 recruiting class being #1 and Robert Gates being the 22nd Texas A&M President and 22nd US Secretary of Defense? The magic is clearly in the numbers. 

How deep does this run? We’re told it extends to not only the US Government, but that Texas A&M has received funds from countries like China, Russia, & Qatar. These are countries known to be rivals of not only the Texas Longhorns, but Nick Saban as well. 

Could this be why Nick Saban had a meltdown this offseason? It is known that Saban has been heavily involved in NIL legislation on Capital Hill through former-Auburn head coach turned US Senator, Tommy Tubervile. 

While we can only speculate what this means for college recruiting going forward, it’s clear that NIL is shaping up to be a national security issue.  

One response to “Message Board Conspiracy Theory Solved: Texas A&M Collective”

  1. Gates was also director of the CIA as well. But honestly, get it right. It’s the cult. Accept the inevitable. 🤣🤣🤣

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